The Aware
Parenting Institute

Transforming families around the world

P.O. Box 206, Goleta, CA 93116, U.S.A.
(805) 968-1868 (phone and fax)

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Aware Parenting Books by Aletha Solter, Ph.D.


The Aware Baby Cooperative and Connected Tears and Tantrums Raising Drug Free Kids Attachment play

The Aware Baby
(revised edition)

Cooperative and Connected
(revised edition of Helping Young Children Flourish)

Tears and Tantrums

Raising Drug-Free Kids

Attachment Play

Foreign language editions: One or more of these books has been translated into Czech, Dutch, Estonian, French, German, Hebrew, Hungarian, Italian, Korean, Lithuanian, Marathi, Polish, Portuguese, Romanian, Russian, Spanish, and Turkish. Please contact a bookstore in your country to order the foreign language editions.

If you are a foreign publisher interested in language rights, please contact us at You can also visit our press room for more information.

Ordering Information (English language editions only)

Foreign language editions

Please click on the book of your choice for more information:

blue dot The Aware Baby (revised edition)
blue dot Cooperative and Connected
blue dot Tears and Tantrums
blue dot Raising Drug-Free Kids
blue dot Attachment Play

The Aware Baby (revised edition)

Published in May 2001
(Conception to 2½ years of age)
ISBN-10: 0-9613073-7-4, ISBN-13: 978-0-9613073-7-0
271 pages, USD$15.95

Click here to see a press release for The Aware Baby.

aware baby

The Aware Baby marks a major breakthrough in our understanding of babies' needs from conception to 2½ years of age. Now translated into Czech, Dutch, French, German, Hebrew, Hungarian, Italian, Polish, Romanian, Turkish, and Spanish, it has sold over 150,000 copies worldwide and contributed to a revolution in parenting around the world. This revised edition includes new research and insights from the author's extensive experience as a consultant and international workshop leader. The author discusses the attachment needs of infants, which are best met by close physical contact, breast-feeding, and prompt responsiveness to crying. At the core of her philosophy is the concept of crying as tension release, with the emphasis that babies should always be held when they cry.

This book will teach you how to:

orange ball Bond with your infant.
orange ball Respond to your baby's crying.
orange ball Enhance your baby's intelligence.
orange ball Help your baby sleep better.
orange ball Find alternatives to punishment.
orange ball Raise your child to be nonviolent.

Praise for The Aware Baby (revised edition)

"The Aware Baby is chock full of reliable information and practical advice on a wide range of childrearing issues from how to deal with infant crying to discipline and toilet training. The style is clear, concise and vivid. It is a pleasure to read, and I recommend it most highly."

Thomas R. Verny, M.D., D. Psych. (Psychiatrist and author of The Secret Life of the Unborn Child)

"The exquisite awareness of babies celebrated in this book is revolutionary and refreshing. Soundly based on empirical research and great good sense, this book will doubly bless both the parents and their very fortunate infants."

David B. Chamberlain, Ph.D. (Psychologist and author of The Mind of Your Newborn Baby)

"Solter's gentle approach to parenting, by promoting acceptance of crying and attentiveness to a child's strong emotions and needs, contains a very important step in raising happy, connected adults."

Martha G. Welch, M.D. (Psychiatrist and author of Holding Time)

"The Aware Baby is an extremely useful (perhaps essential) guidebook for parents and professionals who deal with babies. The book is full of information on solving common problems in raising babies, and most of the material is appropriate for older children as well. I particularly appreciate the depth at which Dr. Solter deals with sleep, feeding, and behavioral difficulties, and the methods that she advocates for dealing with crying (probably the most misunderstood aspect of parenting.) Her chapters on playing with babies and on approaches to bring about secure attachment and bonding are exceptional. This book should be mandatory reading for all parents and for professionals who deal with babies and children."

William R. Emerson, Ph.D. (Pioneer of infant therapy and co-author of Remembering Our Home)

"Only a handful of times in any given century does a book come along which has the knowledge and the power to shift the human race towards a measurably higher state of mental and physical health. Freud's Interpretation of Dreams, at the beginning of the last century, introduced us to the unconscious. Dr. Arthur Janov, in the middle of that century, introduced us to the importance of feelings as a guide to the deepest self. Now Dr. Aletha Solter, in a simple and readable way, by allowing babies to feel their feelings, gives us the key to infant, and later adult, mental health. It is my belief that every prospective parent on earth should read her book, The Aware Baby."

Paul Vereshack, M.D., D. Psych. (Author of The Psychotherapy of The Deepest Self)


Helping Young Children Flourish

Note: This book is out of print. It has been replaced by Cooperative and Connected


Tears and Tantrums:
What to Do When Babies and Children Cry

Published in 1998
(Birth to 8 years of age)
ISBN-10: 0-9613073-6-6, ISBN-13: 978-0-9613073-6-3
177 pages, USD$14.95

Click here to see a press release for Tears and Tantrums.

Tears and Tantrums

Tears and Tantrums describes a new way of understanding the purpose of crying during infancy and childhood. This revolutionary book (now translated into Czech, Dutch, Estonian, French, German, Hebrew, Italian, Lithuanian, Portuguese, Romanian, Russian, Spanish, and Turkish) will help you improve your relationship with children, whether you are a parent, caregiver, teacher, or health professional. You will gain a better understanding of why babies and children cry, and you will learn how best to respond. Other benefits of this approach include:

orange ball Helping babies sleep through the night (without ignoring them).
orange ball Helping children heal from stress and trauma.
orange ball Increasing children's attention span and intelligence.
orange ball Improving children's self-esteem and emotional health.
orange ball Reducing children's violent behavior and hyperactivity.

Praise for Tears and Tantrums

"[Dr. Solter is] more familiar with the scientific research studies for early child development and crying than anyone in the world..... This book will undoubltedly give readers more confidence as parents or caregivers, because it provides them with specific skills that will bring rewards that all parents value, namely, children who are healthier, both physically and psychologically."

From the foreword by Dr. Thomas Gordon (Author of Parent Effectiveness Training)

"I heartily recommend Tears and Tantrums to all parents. It confirms many principles in our clinical work over the past 30 years... This book is a 'must read' for all those caring for children."

Vivian Janov (Director, The Primal Institute)

"[Solter's] emphatic urging that parents not shame or punish children for crying could relieve much of the tension about crying and tantrums suffered by both adults and children."

Publisher's Weekly

"In this, her latest and best book. Dr. Aletha Solter provides outstanding parenting advice on what to do when babies and children cry. Her growing reputation as the leading authority in this area of parenting is well deserved."

Dr. William H. Frey II (Neuroscientist and author of Crying: the Mystery of Tears

"Drawing on scholarship, professional and personal experience, and parents' reactions to the crying workshops she conducts, Solter offers practical, compassionate solutions to problems posed by children's emotional pain and strong feelings... Her empathic tone, clear writing, and knowledgeable advice help make her handbook a welcome addition to parenting literature."

Booklist of the American Library Association

"This book is a breathtaking leap forward for the mental and physical health of the human race. It is one of the most important books of the century, and should be mandatory reading for every young adult on earth."

Paul Vereshack, M.D., D. Psych. (Author of The Psychotherapy of The Deepest Self)

"This book is so important, for the health of our children and our society, that I have put it on my required reading list for professionals and parents who attend my training sessions, and I am recommending it to every professional and parent that I know."

William R. Emerson, Ph.D. (Pioneer in infant and child psychotherapy, director of Emerson Training Seminars)

"In this age where we are trying to find ways to prevent violence in a very violent society, this book is a winner. If only there were some way to get this author's message out to the "masses" of parents who are raising their children in the same old knee-jerk ways."

Elaine Childs-Gowell, Ph.D. (Psychotherapist and author of Good Grief Rituals)

"Aletha J Solter guides parents through the mysteries of crying - what the messages mean and how to respond. Tears and Tantrums is the book I wish my own mother had read, for then I wouldn't have needed therapy later as a young adult. What I discovered about crying through years of hard work, Solter shares in an immediatelty accessible form. My own six children have been responded to as Solter advises, and as a grandmother now, I can vouch for the results! My highest recommendation for Tears and Tantrums. This book needs to be in every library, and is the ideal baby shower gift. The information therein will free families of emotional trauma in order to journey through life's challenges together in trust."

Jeannine Parvati Baker (Midwife and author of Prenatal Yoga and Natural Birth, Conscious Conception, and Hygieia: a Woman's Herbal)

" Tears and Tantrums provides practical information for parents on dealing with crying in infants and children, not as a nuisance or "behavior" to be controlled, but as a natural and spontaneous expression of real emotions. In this developmentally accurate and humanely sensitive guide, parents will learn to respond to their children's crying with love, caring and attunement. This book cries out to be read!"

Thomas Armstrong, Ph.D. (author of Awakening Your Child's Natural Genius)


This page was last updated on February 4, 2020. Copyright © 1996 to 2019 by Aletha Solter. All rights reserved. No part of this web site may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means,electronic or mechanical (including copying to other web sites, and including translations), without written permission from Aletha Solter, with the exception of printing pages for personal use. This copyright applies to all the pages and articles from the Aware Parenting Institute web site and Shining Star Press.